Don’t Be That Way!
By Andrew Liddle

Article reproduced from July 2013 edition of  Just Jazz Magazine
By kind permission of Andrew Liddle,

 

 

I was in a university bar the other day and I saw a large, glossy advert for ‘Lindy’ dancing classes. Below it was a list of students who had signed up for it.  About fifty had.  This was in Newcastle, but I’ve seen the splendid finished product of such classes gyrating at Leeds Jazz Club, where at times the youngsters turn up in droves.

 

It got me thinking.  What if?

 

What if the long-awaited Jazz Revival had actually started?  What if these were the green shoots.  Wasn’t Jazz originally primarily a music to dance to?  Are we on the point of attaining the real new Millennium?

 

Why not?  Why could it not happen?  We are all agreed the product is good enough.  To most of us who take this magazine, it’s more than good enough.  It’s the only product, musically speaking.  It’s the music that shakes the blues away, makes me happy when I’m sad and sad when I’m happy – sad in the way that only sheer pleasure can make one sad in its impermanence, its memento of the transience and mutability of life.

 

In any case, Jazz is more than just music; it’s more a way of life.  It’s the balm and the boon of the oppressed and underprivileged.  It’s everything that’s happy and unfettered, free of the miserable constraints of bourgeois indoctrination.  Jazz musicians don’t just follow dots on a page; they don’t breathe when they’re supposed to.  They don’t jump when a man out front with a stick points at them.  They jump when they feel like it which is the way nature intended it. Hey-Bob-A-Rebop!

 

I’d better terminate that self-aggrandising paragraph and get back to the thread.  If Jazz is as good as we think it is, perhaps even  better than we know it to be – because very few of us know more than one area of it, one continent in a vast world – then one day it must return and reconquer.

 

Surely, the world is waiting for such a sunrise like never before, a musical messiah with a new vibe.  This music that in its broadest sense lasted longer than any other popular form, giving a name – the Jazz Age - to a period that effectively spans three decades, must surely come again.  I mean there’s not been much opposition really has there, coming from the three-chord greasers to the headbangers and guitar-wreckers, the otiose boy bands and gormless girl bands, Alice Coopers and Alice bands, Boy Georges and ZZ Tops, in short the alpha and omega of musical vacuity – lacking melody, harmony, resonance and all the staples of music save rhythm. So much that I hear inadvertently these days sounds like junk and only to junkheads can sound like music.

 

While we’re on the hobbyhorse, we might as well tilt at the lack of words as well, the absolute paucity of anything that is intelligible and poetic.  What might Mitchell Parish, some of whose lyrics, in Stardust, Deep Purple, Moonlight Serenade and a host of other songs, stand comparison with the very greatest of poets, or Cole Porter, or Dorothy Fields or Jimmy (Red Sails In The Sunset, Isle of Capri, South of the Border) Kennedy make of it all?

 

Someone once said to me what wonderful lyrics the Beatles wrote and I couldn’t help riposting: “Yeah, yeah, yeah,  like ‘Norwegian Wood, ain’t it good’, or ‘I’ll buy you diamond rings and things if it makes you feel all right’, or the subtle way they rhymed ‘dog’ and ‘log’ in A Hard Day’s Night, or that nuanced repetition of ‘Judie, Judie, Judie’.” Well, those who prefer Strawberry Fields to Blueberry Hill (and I’m thinking here more of Louis and Glenn Miller than of Fats per se ) are welcome to their preferences.

 

Don’t get me started on the ‘lyrics’ of Rap!

 

So let’s take the premise, then, that Jazz will inevitably return. But even more certain is it that when it does it will not be in exactly the same form.  How could it be since there’s nothing exact about it in the first place?  Revivals of anything always incorporate an element of revisionism, selectivity and original creativity.  Look at the new trams.  When, for example, I hear young female Jazz singers today, I am generally aware of something alien tugging at their voice strings, causing a voice wobble that they don’t know they have and will never get rid of.  It’s as indelibly printed on their voice graphs as the vowel sounds and inflections in their everyday accent. It’s what they’ve heard in their formative years and what they’ve internalised and it owes very much more (I’m guessing) to Britney than to Billie.

 

So inevitably when the Great Revival mark two comes (I’m now saying when not if), there’ll be some changes made.  And this got me thinking even more.  Would I be rushing headlong to embrace the new music – or would I be finding purist reasons to reject it.  I’m reminded here of those evangelising Christians who actually, I’m told, resent it when urban expansion brings new faces to their church, oftcumdens (as we say in Yorkshire), who sit in their pews and park in their space and delight the vicar.

 

I think I might, in spite of all my best intentions, actually really rather frown on the revival.  My father did!

 

My thoughts go down the vista of years to a terrace house in Halifax, in the 1950s, and the monthly meetings, in our parlour, of the Halifax Rhythm Club, of which my father was secretary.  I was usually ushered out of the way when four or five augustly bearded gentlemen arrived bearing their 78s before them, in much the manner of today’s pizza deliverers.

 

One of them was a war hero called Eric who had lost his legs in combat and kept a jeweller’s shop.  He was a bit better off than the majority, had the biggest collection and, I would think, set the tone of the meetings.

 

Affable soul that he was, there was one thing that really got his goatee.  It was when I intruded and asked him if he had any of my then hero, Chris Barber.  I might as well have asked for a dunce’s cap at an Oxford college or some other kind of cap in the Vatican!  Eric and his coterie reacted with unfeigned rage, not to say apoplexy. (I’d very much like to know what my father recorded in his minutes.) Barber, you see, to them was an impudent upstart, a virile young man condemned by his popularity and his damnable usurpation of their heroes, King Oliver, Louis, Wingy Manone, the Savoy Havannahs, The Rhythmic Eight et al.

 

Something told me not to mention Lonnie Donegan.

 

Barber, to them, was barbaric.  Barber was something that got stuck on your shoe.  Barber had to be invisible and inaudible.

 

I can, if I’m being honest, see myself reacting similarly if suddenly a Wayne Butler, a Kyle Taylor, a Beckham Baker arrived on the scene, full of the vigour and arrogance and ambition of youth and with all its indestructibility, not to mention a full head of hair, a great deal of technical brilliance on the trombone and brimming over with passion for the music I thought I had proprietorial rights over, which he was now tweaking just a little, giving it a few subtle nods in the direction of pop, a few new up tempo arrangements.

 

Would I and a good many grey beards like me really want to acknowledge this as a future great at the dawn of the new millennium.  What would the chaps still doing sterling work in our Trad bands, as they have for these last forty or fifty years, think about it?  They might be dusting off an old song that Bessie sang: “ I ain’t gonna play no second fiddle, I’m used to playing lead!”

 

Maybe, for me, the only way forwards is like one of those advances backwards that the Italian army specialised in!

 

Diga Diga Doo!

 

 Andrew Liddle

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